Beyond the Phrase: Why Nigeria Must Stop ‘Happening’ to Its People

 

By Abioye Tosin Lawrence

There is a phrase that has quietly become a national reflex: “Nigeria has happened to me.”

It slips easily into conversations after a failed system, an avoidable tragedy, or yet another moment of disappointment. What began as an expression of frustration has now evolved into something deeper: a shared belief that the country is something that acts upon its people, often negatively.

But nations are not abstract forces. They do not “happen” on their own.

What we call Nigeria is a complex reflection of leadership, institutions, and most importantly, its people. Yet, by constantly framing the country as an uncontrollable force, we subtly remove responsibility from both the system and ourselves.

We now operate in an environment where insecurity feels unpredictable, where people move with caution as though danger is an ever-present shadow. In such a climate, trust erodes, and survival instincts take over a dangerous mindset forms: everyone for themselves.

And when that mindset takes root, something more troubling follows, a decline in empathy.

When people believe the system has failed them completely, they begin to justify actions that further weaken it. Sympathy fades. Accountability becomes optional. Wrongdoing is rationalized. The phrase “Nigeria has happened to me” becomes not just a complaint, but a quiet excuse.

Yet, there is a contradiction we often ignore.There are Nigerians who thrive, who find opportunities, who build, who succeed despite the odds. Interestingly, they rarely describe their experience as something that “happened” to them. This does not invalidate the struggles of others, but it challenges us to rethink the narrative.

Because perception shapes behavior.

A nation consistently described as broken will gradually produce people who act without regard for its survival. But a nation spoken of with responsibility and belief, even in its imperfections can inspire a different kind of citizen.

This is where the shift must begin. Nigeria must stop “happening” to its people, not just through better governance and stronger institutions, but through a conscious reorientation of mindset. Citizens must begin to see themselves not only as victims of the system, but as contributors to its direction.

This is not an argument for blind patriotism or denial of reality. The challenges are real. The frustrations are valid. But if the only story we tell is one of failure, then failure becomes the only future we prepare for.

We must begin to ask harder questions:

What kind of country are we reinforcing with our words?

What kind of behavior are we normalizing with our beliefs?

Nigeria is not a finished story. It is still being written daily, by millions of hands, voices, and choices.

The moment we move from saying “Nigeria has happened to me” to “Nigeria is happening through me,” we reclaim power. And perhaps, that is where real change begins.

Abioye Tosin Lawrence

Publisher, Oriontimes Online Newspaper